I hate Valentines Day. Or, I did hate Valentine’s Day until I chose that day to give birth to my son. My doctor kept swearing that I would not make it through the weekend back in February 2000. So I simply asked that in the event that I DID make it through until Monday, February 14, could I PLEASE come in to be induced. The rest is history.
I guess I have a problem with any of those token holidays where we choose that ONE day to do something…give thanks, love, etc.
So, Valentine’s Day is Max’s birthday. It gives us a reason to celebrate on February 14th without the added pressures of hearts and flowers. He’ll finally be a teenager this year and he’s requested a stretch Hummer limo, his buddies, and a 6-foot sub sandwich. That is not happening. He’ll likely end up at the local arcade with his friends and they can game until they turn blue!
With regard to love, and the language of love…
I’m a firm believer that it’s not just about one day. It can’t be. The hearts and flowers are great! Who doesn’t like to receive gifts? But I find the language of love in much smaller places and spaces every single day. It’s in:
- a quick phone call to find out how my day was
- a text to say “Hi, I’m on my way home”
- a clean kitchen
- folded laundry
- a refrigerator full of groceries that I didn’t have to shop for
- a child waiting up for me to get home even though it’s past bedtime
- a spontaneous, mid-week dinner out
- that ‘life preserver’ exactly when I need it
…there’s more.
It’s really with all the little things, that life and love become sustainable. It’s the genuine caring and kindness that’s shown where love gets fostered and continues to grow. It’s not always about that romantic relationship. Friendships, partnerships, parents and kids (whatever age!), and even in the newest relationships, it can be easy to see that love. As humans, perhaps we don’t stop and think enough about what we can do to be that “love” in someone else’s life. Love is not a grand, sweeping gesture. But rather, the day-to-day small things that keep us grounded and connected.
I love this blog. Valentines Day has always been a disaster in my home. This year I have vowed not to care and focus on all the wonderful people in my life. Thanks for the reminder that love is found in small things.
WOW!! So well said, Allison. I think when we are young, we would like to think (and almost expect) that love will sweep us off of our feet. While in some cases it does, I think we need to look at the little things in our every day life to understand that love continues to sweep us off our feet, even though it may be in a very different way than we expected. If we, especially as young women, expect love continue to be the romantic love we see in movies long after we get married, we will surely be disappointed. But, if we see the little “romantic” gestures that our loved ones express, we can truly appreciate that lifelong partnership.